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Hell Of A Year

 

It’s been a hell of a year, but I’m mentally prepared

To do a dance around the next couple medical scares

I’m Fred Astaire with the metal wearing quickly off my tap shoes

So I step quietly, the way that cat’s move

But I’m bear-like. My head trapped in dear lights

You can call me John, I’m writing letters to the dark side of the moon tonight

My lovely Jane, you went away but the pain stayed

So I’m sending you a package to the address where you traded names

I made no claims on the identity theft

I’m more concerned about the home with no amenities left

And it’s already a mess. The dust piles like your junk mail

So I eat away depression and crush the scale

You find yourself on the opposite side of the spectrum

Emaciated on a strict diet of bed crumbs

Me? I choose to wallow and I’ll just swim in my fat

You refuse to swallow so I see ribs from the back

This isn’t an attack, it’s an admission of guilt

I’m living in the past, kissing your ass, sipping your milk

But it’s all bone and curdle. I saw stones in a circle

Stood in the middle. Told myself riddles in a robe that’s purple

The murder weapon was an icicle

Is that the reason why I’m standing in this puddle with my eyes so full?

I fight feelings like a war on drugs

I’m a chemist with a test tube addiction born through coffee mugs

Our baby now is all growed up

Your car is still dead in my driveway while I wait for the tow truck

And you know what? I know I drove you away

I still don’t think it was wrong so I don’t know what to say

It’s been a tough year. You say that life ain’t fair

Well, guess what, baby life ain’t. Thems the breaks

You say that life ain’t worth it. But it is. You gotta work it

Nobody’s life is perfect

 

Yeah, you’ve been dealt a bad hand. Placed against a stacked deck

Been through all the cat scans and bad checks

But I slashed your debt. Not your wrists

And I couldn’t help with anything else that became cancerous

Halfway people with a full baby to bury

Took a flame to the papier-mache sanctuary

When the smoke clears try not to stare into the light

But, also, don’t stay in the dark as if that’s what life is like

It’s just a series of unfortunate events

But the messages we get are more important than death

What’s the rush?

I’ve got a shortness of breath

What’s the rush?

Running from you running from me

It’s the rush. The crush. The lust. The love-trust

So what’s the trouble? The busted bubble? The unjust?

But suck it up. We’re all looking, but nothing’s enough

We used each other as a crutch. The clutch. The shift switches

You couldn’t just adjust. You combusted and ripped pictures

This is why I’m not considered a saint?

Well, guess what? I ain’t

 

It’s been a hell of a year

You said that I ain’t there, I ain’t care, and life ain’t fair

It’s been a hell of a trip

You say my mind’s unfit, I’ve been flip, and I ain’t shit

It’s been a hell of a life

You say that I ain’t like the way I write and that ain’t right

It’s been a hell of an attempt

You say that I ain’t meant for promises unkept

Well, guess what, darlin

I’m a keep keep callin

Guess what, darlin

I’m a keep keep callin